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Winners of the Kindle Contest

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We are a bit late posting our winners. Our deepest apologies for the delay.

Thanks to all who entered. We pray for your seminary journey to be one of great transformation.

We’ll post the first article on Monday, September 6.

And, the winners are:

I Keep My Eyes Open During Prayer – Nick Ng
Rebuilt Houses – Jason Chamberlain
Serving Pizza and Making Copies – Seth Ross
What They Don’t Tell You On The Walking Tour – Anthony Russo

More Free Kindles For Seminary Students

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Its time for another writing contest! We’re going to give away four e-readers or $200 toward books. (winner’s choice)

Have you thought about sharing your seminary journey with the world? Perhaps you are interested in pontificating about how seminary could be better, or have questions that you’re not finding answers to regarding your seminary journey. Maybe you already have a blog, but not the readership you’d like to have.

Now is your chance to build readership, pontificate about seminary to your heart’s desire, or give blogging your first go around.

Submit your 500 to 750 word article on whatever topic you like as long as it has to do with seminary. You must be a current seminary student and the articles must be original work not previously posted or submitted to another website.

Out of the entries we’ll select the four winners. Those winners will then submit three more articles, one per month, over the next three months. At the end of those three months they will get their choice of the e-readers. A Kindle, a Sony e-reader, a Nook, a Kobo, or a $200 gift certificate to purchase textbooks from Amazon, B&N, or Borders. All four writers will have their choice! Or if a new ereader is on the market at the $200 price tag we’ll gladly substitute it instead.

Submit your article by August 23, 2010, via email to justaguy[at]goingtoseminary.com. We’ll announce the four winners on August 30, 2010.

—–Update 8/20/2010—–

We’re going to extend the submission deadline until Friday, August 27. We’ll still announce the winners on Monday, August 30.

Need some ideas for writing about your seminary journey? We took a few “hot button” issues from past comments and experiences to help you get started. Feel free to use them.

    • How do you deal with crappy profs who are teaching from notes that are 30 years old?
    • What is a fair and unfair academic policy, or transfer policy, or admissions guidelines?
    • Is it right for seminaries that hold certain theological positions to demand the same from students?
    • What is the right balance between academic leaning and practical leaning assignments?
    • How effective can a seminary student (who has never served as a pastor) be when criticizing a fellow seminary student who is a pastor?
    • What is the usefulness of sitting around for hours gabbing about theological issues that won’t ever be resolved?
    • How important is accreditation?
    • What is the real dollar cost of seminary education?
    • How many textbooks should be required for a seminary course?
    • What is the ideal age for a seminary student?
    • What role can mentors play in seminary education?
    • How do I involve my spouse in my seminary journey?
    • What if my spouse leaves me while I’m in seminary? What should I do?
    • Is a seminary graduate better equipped to serve Christ than someone who didn’t attend seminary?
    • What do you do about friends who are cheating?
    • How do I keep my spiritual life alive in Seminary?

      Leaving a Legacy

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      Many of the posts here on GTS have pointed out that seminary students realize during their academic career just how starved they were for formal training. Even students who were reared in church all their lives have commented on how little they actually knew about the richness in God’s Word that can be discovered by learning new study methods or language principles.

      That’s where leaving a legacy for someone else can be so important. Many of our young men and women coming up in our churches as the leaders of tomorrow may feel that they do not have time for seminary. Many men and women who are answering or hearing God’s call later in their lives may feel that they do not have time either. The fact is, though, that they are just as in need of solid training as those taking a more traditional academic track.

      It is also worthy to note that with the multiple options available today due to technology that there is very little reason that someone can’t further their education in at least some fashion. There are classes available for little to no cost at most denominational associations. There are online studies and blogs that lend themselves to students and learners who wish to enhance and deepen their biblical knowledge. And there are a growing number of seminaries that are increasing the online availability of their content so people can take classes without uprooting their lives.

      So how is this at all related to a legacy? It’s easy – we need to, as seminary students and graduates, convey to others the richness we have realized as a result of our formal training. Here are a few simple steps that will help you leave a legacy that will go beyond the degree you receive in seminary.

      1. Work to dispel the myth that seminary is not needed. Sure – seminary to some may seem like a waste of time and money. And certainly I have experienced classes that seem to be less useful in ministry than others I have taken. But I have yet to take a class that offered nothing to me in light of my ministry calling. All of the classes I have taken have given me at least a portion of insight that I did not have before taking them. Your opinion of the value of seminary may be the qualifier that someone is looking for to go ahead and take the first step toward enrollment.

      2. There is no such thing as “when I have time!” If we all waited until we had time to do that “next thing” in our lives – we would NEVER get to them. Ministry is just as demanding, if not more, than any other vocation. And since we are focused on matters that are spiritual, it can be easy to drop in to a belief of “I can’t spend time on my training because my ministry will suffer.” The truth of the matter is that ministry will be enhanced by further training. Helping ministers realize that they will be a more effective by pursuing training may be the gentle nudge they need to readjust their priorities and make time for seminary.

      3. It doesn’t have to be “all or nothing.” Some people will know right-off-the-bat that they will not be able to complete any type of seminary degree. They will either not have all of the resources to pay for it or they will convince themselves that they just do not have the time to do it. But they can take at least one course or two every year. Be the voice of reason for someone by telling them that even though they may not be able to complete an entire degree – they can take a class or two here and there that will help them be more effective in ministry. This will allow them to focus on classes that are specific to their ministry focus and will allow them to be exposed to the seminary process. Who knows – they might even find a way to give more time to their training and pursue more creative avenues for paying for it.

      4. If you can – put your money where your mouth is. It is no secret that the academic community has been just as affected by the current economic situation as other companies and institutions. The tragedy here, though, is that the value of their impact on the spiritual pulse of our nations and world is very significant as their training impacts the ministers of our nation and world. If you know of someone who needs to be pursuing seminary in some fashion and you are able to do so – offer to pay for a portion of his or her classes or for all of them. If you do not have that capability, use some of the resources you found for yourself when paying for seminary to help persons push their creative boundaries for resourcing their schooling. Your investment will leave a more significant mark on their lives and the lives they will touch for God’s Kingdom than any Greek organization.

      Getting it All Done

      A frequent question we face is “How do we get done all that we want to do?” It’s a very important question, but if we think about this way, it’s the wrong question. A better question is “How do I do all that God has given me to do?” There is one person who has walked among us who has been able to do just that. John 17 is a well known chapter in which Jesus prays for His disciples. But right before he does that, note carefully what He says in verse 4: “I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do.” (NIV)  That’s quite a shocking statement, especially given the fact that he says this before He has gone to the cross. Yet He has completed all that God has given Him to do. He has not done all he could do, and definitely has not done all that others wanted Him to do, but God simply doesn’t ask us to do more than we can. Ever.

      I was thinking about this in reading Nancy Wilson’s recent post on GtS on “The Balancing Act.” She realized that she had placed too high an importance on her coursework, that “while I needed to attend to my studies, I didn’t have to give 110% every time.” How did this good advice go together with my post on “Maximize Your Learning Experience”?

      When it came to getting things done, Jesus was a master of prioritizing at two different levels: strategic and operational. He got the big picture right – He knew why He was here, what His priorities were, and where He needed to invest most of His time. That meant for some very tough decisions. He focused on doing the will of the Father, on reaching the people of Israel, and on building deeply into the lives of only a handful of men. Everything He did reflected His top priorities. Equally importantly, he always seemed to get it right in-the-moment. He took time out for individuals, to heal people, to go to dinner parties with sinners. His sermons got to the point, His teaching time was focused, He never got bogged down arguing with His critics, and He balanced family and ministry perfectly.

      Well, we don’t have perfect knowledge what God has called us to do in detail, nor do we know perfectly what is going on in the lives of those around us – so how do we do better at getting things done? We also need to think in terms of our time and priorities both at a high level and in the details, and tie the two together as best we can. It starts with making the most vital things top priorities in our lives (not just on paper) – time with God, with family, taking care of ourselves, serving others, and sharing Christ. Also at a high level, we need to spend time listening to God and exploring His call for our lives. We need to understand our gifts and strengths, as these shed much light on what He expects from us.

      What’s the tie-in to moment-to-moment decisions? How does it impact letting a course slide versus maximizing learning? Return on investment of time. With our fixed budget of hours, where do we see the highest return in the light of our calling and priorities? If family is a top priority, block out time on your calendar for it. Figure out how much time you should be spending on studies (the balancing act), then make the absolute most you can the time with your study time (maximize your learning). For example, spending an extra 30-60 minutes writing notes and reflecting on application after I’ve read a book greatly increases the value of reading it. That’s a super return on investment. All courses are not equal in the light of your calling. ‘Get by’ with those that aren’t, and do so guilt-free knowing that you are focusing your time where God wants you to. Your seminary professor will choose what is required reading vs. what is supplemental, but that doesn’t mean you give all books equal attention (or ignore ‘optional’ ones). Skim some, read others, and devour the ones that can really impact your life and ministry. Go the extra mile when you see an opportunity to tie in studies with your current ministry, do the minimum when the benefit is minimal. Share what you learn with others who would benefit from it – that’s a triple win: you learn more by teaching others, they benefit from hearing, and you build relationships and build leaders in the process.

      We can’t get done everything we would like to do, but when we tie-in what we’re doing and where we spend our time with what God has called us to do, we get a lot more of value done – without short-changing ourselves or those we love.

      Life Doesn’t Get Easier

      We like to think, during times of challenge or stress, that life will get easier.

      I have bad news. Are you sitting down?

      It doesn’t.

      Not without intentionally letting some things go.

      It took me a long time to see this. College was a huge step up in difficulty compared to high school, where homework problems were tidy and simple, and A’s came without studying. Then grad school made college look like a walk in the park. Surely things could not get any worse than this? I told myself  “It’s just for a season, I can suffer through for 4-5 years.” Finally, life as an Assistant Professor. To my great surprise, the life of a junior professor was worse than that of a dog. I longed for the ‘easy’ days of grad school. As the crazy hours started to take their toll, I began to ask tenured profs how they liked their jobs now that ‘things were finally easy.’ They laughed. They had to keep doing all the hard work I was doing, but now had the added responsibility of having other mouths to feed. The careers of their students depended on whether or not they could keep getting grants. Why was I learning this only now?!

      I made some very big changes in my life, switched careers, and found that once again I had a life — this time with me defining success instead of the world. Fast forward a decade, and I’m back at grad school – seminary this time, and with a changed perspective and priorities. Here are a few things I’m seeing differently this second go around…

      Know why you’re doing this — you may waste a lot of time pursuing something that was never right for you in the first place if you don’t understand both your calling and the true nature of the work you seek to do as a profession.

      Stepping stones are often stumbling blocks in disguise — I had way too many fellows students and co-workers convinced that putting in their time, paying their dues, were the price of success, and that a joyless present was the price of a future of bliss. They (and I) were mistaken. God may very well see you go through a difficult period that will prepare you for future service, but choosing a path where you find no contentment or where you put ‘on hold’ vital things he expects of His followers is surely no way to live, or to honor Him.

      Balance in life is more about integrating than becoming good at multi-tasking — it’s far better to kill two birds with one stone than to juggle attention between two distinct tasks. Tie-in your studies with the rest of your life and ministry. Pass on what you’re learning with others rather than developing two separate lessons. Serve together with your spouse or family when possible rather than seeing the two in competition. Be a little less concerned with what’s going to be on the test than what you need for your ministry later and what God is teaching you to serve someone else right now.

      Back to my main point at the start of this post… don’t put your life on ‘hold’ for studies or anything else. Don’t wait to get involved in ministry. Don’t wait to tithe, to invest in the lives of others, to love the most important people in your life, to incorporate a true Sabbath and times of reflection in your life… today! If whatever you think you are preparing for is so demanding that you feel you need to kill yourself now, you’re setting yourself up for failure.

      I’m not at all suggesting you shy away from challenges, but in accepting them make sure that as you go through this season of preparation and learning that you love what you do, are energized by the learning, and apply what you learn in significant ways… now. If that doesn’t seem possible, take some time and think about what you need to let go of in your life to really pursue what you feel passionate about and what you hear God calling you to become. It could change your life.

      Prisms of Thought

      “Each word…is like a prism whose shape allows the refraction of many colors. The color or colors you see will change, depending on your position and the position, angle, and source of the light interacting with the prism.”
      -Brian K. Blount, author of “Can I Get a Witness?” regarding interpretation of the Book of Revelation

      I’m sure that many of us can attest to the beauty of scripture and have found that it speaks to us in different ways on different days. Likewise, I could well imagine that many of us have sat in on numerous Bible studies where the range of views and responses to the lessons have been quite diverse. We can carry this idea even further when we think of the breadth of gifts and graces that have been extended to each one of us by God in order to carry out the work of the Kingdom.

      Yes, we are a diverse people. And that is no less true of our theology. One only has to look around to see the many denominations that comprise our Christian faith to know that we often hold differing views of what constitutes worship, study, sacrament, or mission in our churches. And, a review of the works of theologians throughout the centuries reminds us that there does not appear to be any single universal thought about who God is, what role Jesus plays, and how we are to respond.

      So why, then, is it so unsettling to learn of the various ways that people view Jesus? Why do we feel shock or amazement when we encounter views, particularly at seminary, that are more liberal or conservative than ours? Does it make us question our own faith? Or, does it make us more resolute on the beliefs we currently hold?

      One thing I have found during my time at seminary is that I’m learning to celebrate our differences. Case in point: There are at least 18 different denominational affiliations represented at the seminary which I attend. Being in chapel and exploring the various ways that people worship, experiencing the many expressions of faith in song and word, and participating in a wide range of communion practices is actually quite illuminating. Likewise, the classroom turns into a great place of discussion and sharing when many divergent views are present. Do we always agree with the beliefs of others? No, nor are we required to do so. Perhaps we can be like John Wesley who shared the following:
      “But although a difference in opinions or modes of worship may prevent an entire external union, yet need it prevent our union in affection? Though we cannot think alike, may we not love alike? May we not be of one heart, though we are not of one opinion? Without all doubt, we may.
      -From The Forty Four Sermons by John Wesley, Epworth 1944, pp443-444.
      One of the reasons that I chose to attend seminary was to be tested. I truly wanted to know why I believed what I believed. I wanted to be challenged and to be poked and prodded regarding my faith. How else could I expect to be a steady and clear voice to those who will one day look to me for answers? And, will I have all of them? Certainly not. But, I know the One who does and I will gladly commit myself to journey along with my fellow travelers as they discover the beauty of the Christian faith.

      Tick-Tock: A Seminary Student’s Greatest Enemy?

      Anytime I think about how to make the most of my time, I am reminded of an episode of the popular television show The Simpsons. In the episode one of the main characters, Homer, has a near-death experience. He is told that he has been poisoned and has just 24 hours to live, and so he makes a list of the things he wants to do before he dies. Unfortunately, Homer starts his day by oversleeping his alarm by 5 ½ hours, and after numerous distractions can only complete the most important tasks on his list. After waking the next morning surprised to be alive, he exclaims, “From this day forward, I vow to live life to its fullest!” But as the closing credits roll, he is shown planted on the couch eating pork rinds and watching pro bowling. This humorous look at Homer’s attempt to spend his last hours in a meaningful fashion also highlight one of the greatest struggles for any seminary student: time management.

      Every day we are faced with tough choices on how to manage our time in a way that is prosperous and glorifying to God. Although we may be tempted to think of this as a new struggle in our technology-saturated age, time management has been around since the very foundation of the Church. Paul exhorted the believers at Ephesus to “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time” (Ephesians 5:15-16a, ESV). Appropriate time management is not only wise, but it is also a Christian mandate. It is also an incredibly challenging discipline. Oftentimes as seminary students we are faced with a choice between good, better, and best. Do we start doing research for that paper that’s due in three weeks or do we spend a night growing closer to our family? Should I go to that baseball game with my friends, or should I mow the lawn? Rarely do we have an easy choice to make when it concerns how we allot our time. On top of all that, we have time that we intend to use for good, and end up wasting. We know we should be studying, but we find ourselves on Facebook yet again. But in order to use our time wisely, we have to gain a biblical perspective.

      Psalm 90 is all about the brevity of life. Moses compares the years of man to grass that sprouts up in the morning and has withered by nightfall. The climax of this discourse on the temporal nature of man is verse 12, where Moses prays, “So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.” We’re accustomed to counting our days forward, celebrating birthdays each year, but Moses cautions us that when we look at our life, it should be a countdown. After all, as James says, we are not guaranteed tomorrow. Time management begins when we look at life from God’s (and Kansas’) perspective: as dust in the wind. When I started realizing how short my life is, I started thinking twice about hitting the snooze button. I lamented the time I wasted playing videogames and wasting my time on a thousand different meaningless pursuits. Richard Baxter gave a wise reminder concerning the redemption of time: “Do not let worthless recreations, idle talk, unprofitable company, or sleep rob you of your precious time. Be more careful to escape that person, action, or course of life that would rob you of your time than you would be to escape thieves and robbers.”

      When we’re faced with the tough decisions where both options look equally enticing and equally beneficial, we mustn’t forget that time is one of the greatest resources God has given us. It can be our greatest enemy or our greatest ally. If we don’t take inventory of how we use our time, we can let it slip away. We can procrastinate and race the clock to turn in assignments, or we can redeem the time and let not a single moment pass by. At the end of my life (and my studies), I want to be able to say that I numbered my days with wisdom and that I used the time in such a way that Christ was glorified and made known among the peoples. And that will be time well spent.

      Maximize Your Learning Experience

      As a volunteer leader attending seminary online I sometimes feel out of place. I don’t have the experience or skills of many of my classmates. But as an ex-professor and someone with a PhD in Chemical Engineering, there is one thing I do fairly well… I love learning! God made me a learner, so I want to share some of the top things I’ve found helpful in my studies. The professor in my very first class at Rockbridge said something I still remember with a smile: “You really maximized your learning experience!”

      Top 10 Ways to Maximize Your Learning Experience

      10) Your professor is your friend! Don’t be afraid to ask your prof for help. Get to know him or her. In grad school they’re no longer parent figures, they’re your peers. Nothing gets them more fired up than seeing a student develop a passion for what they’re learning. What breaks their heart is to see a student struggle in silence or just plain give up. They’re there to make a difference in someone’s live.

      9) Read the “optional” recommended books in the syllabus.
      Bright minds with tremendous experience and wisdom have hand picked a cream-of-the-crop list of resources to help you learn. Don’t be dissuaded by the few extra hours or dollars it will cost you. It’s a great investment of time and money, small in comparison to your years at school.

      8) Choose electives that will stretch you. Don’t pick all the ones in major or the easy ones. Choose several to hone existing strengths and but also pick a few way outside your main area, one that you think will be fun or just offer a different perspective.

      7) Constantly ask “so what?” The goal of your education is not to cram your head with knowledge, it’s to seek wisdom and to be transformed as a discipleship. Don’t complain something doesn’t seem relevant, dig deeper until you find a principle or practice you can apply. Get something on your calendar or to-do list. Application of what you’re studying will either cement learning of truth or reveal your understanding to be false when you try to put it into practice.

      6) Share what you’re learning with your team or some other outsider. Talk about it with a friend over lunch, discuss things within your small group, or teach a class. Blog about what you’re learning if you don’t have the opportunity to do this! Nothing helps you learn better than having to teach someone else. This also fosters a learning culture in your own church and within your team that will pay dividends in the long run.

      5) Read your textbooks in multiple passes. First pass, skim it fairly quickly, even if you just read headings and call-outs. Do this before your class starts or in first week for a high-level overview of the book. Second, read it in full, taking notes and/or highlighting according to the syllabus/assignment schedule. Third time, when the class is done with that book, write summary notes by reviewing headings, your notes and highlights. As you do this, look once more for concrete items to add to your to-do list, someday list, or calendar.

      4) Have an open mind when you read. You do not have to agree with everything you read, but you should definitely be humble enough to learn all you can any book or person. Do not dismiss an author or classmate just because you feel they’re wrong about something or don’t like them. You’re going to have to serve and get along with people who disagree strongly with you on some issues for the rest of your life, why not get some practice handling that well now?!

      3) Interact often with your classmates. Ask them tons of questions, challenge and encourage them. Give them permission to ask you tough questions and push you. Especially in seminary, talk about things not in the curriculum, share dreams, pray for one another. Seminary should not be a place where ministry is put on pause – seminary is a place where you continue to minister as you learn.

      2) Start your homework assignments early. I know, I know, there’s no way you can do this. You can, and here’s why you should: i) it will take the same amount of time to do a good job whether you do it now or later; ii) you’ll thank yourself profusely when things hit the fan on the eve of a huge assignment, that you finished a few days early; iii) good study and work habits developed out of a sense of discipline now will serve you well naturally later; iv) this is THE best way to reduce stress about school and homework. It takes effort, and you need to be committed to this approach from day one of classes, but it really pays off.

      1) Find a good mentor who has the time and interest to meet with you. This is really a big deal where I’m now going to school. It’s a fully online seminary which requires students to find such a mentor before the end of the first week of each class. Make sure they know it’s for a limited duration. When you can discuss what you’re learning – whether things that are exciting or confusing – you’ll learn so much more from your class. When it’s someone who cares about you and has experience related to the class, that’s pure gold!

      I know some of these may sound challenging or idealistic, but trust me, these are not pie-in-the-sky ideal things to ponder, they’re very practical tips that will truly help you maximize your learning experience – whether online or in the classroom, seminary or grad school. Got other tips? Share them in the comments!

      Developing a Reading Plan for Seminary

      So you’re in seminary. Your journey has included countless hours of study, late nights tucked away in seldom-visited corners of the library, and copious amounts of caffeine to keep you going. Ancient Greek draws you closer to insanity, and you feel if you learn one more Hebrew stem, your brain just may explode. But if you’re a brave enough soul, you may want to supplement your class work with additional reading. Perhaps your seminary subscribes to a theological bent different than your own, and you’d like to do some research on the subject. Maybe you just want to be able to keep from saying, “Because my seminary taught me so,” when someone asks why you believe in a particular doctrine. If that is the case, you’ll want to develop a reading plan to hone your beliefs. This has been my experience, and I humbly submit to you several tips concerning developing a reading plan.

      1. Create a plan you can handle, and stick to it- There’s no point in creating a reading plan if it’s something you’ll follow for a week and give up on. Chances are, if you’re taking a full load of classes, working forty hours a week, and raising a family, you won’t be able to read a book a week. Also if your goal is to read through Calvin’s Institutes or Grudem’s Systematic Theology, you may want to give yourself ample time to work through those. So figure out how much time you have to devote to additional reading, and create a plan that will stretch you, but at the same time won’t overwhelm you.

      2. Take notes- If you’re anything like me, you forget 99% of what you read the moment you flip the page. So it helps to keep a notebook handy to jot down anything you find to be particularly important. Remember, reading is not a race; it’s okay to take your time as you go through a book if it helps you to keep from forgetting what you’ve learned. It may even be helpful to summarize each page or chapter in a few paragraphs if what you’ve read is especially heavy.

      3. Vary it up, Part 1- It’s important when studying a particular doctrine to read authors which approach the doctrine from various angles. For example, if you’re a cessationist, don’t read books on the spiritual gifts written only by fellow cessationists. Check out something by a continuationist. It will give you a better understanding of the arguments made by the other side, as well as dispel any misconceptions you may have about the other viewpoint. It’s not the easiest thing to read something you disagree with, but in the end it will strengthen your own view, or even cause you to reconsider your position.

      4. Vary it up, Part 2- You should also consider reading other types of books occasionally. If you are reading only deep theological books, you may be refreshed by picking up something lighter from time to time. This doesn’t have to be hard: if you like baseball, read a book on Roberto Clemente. If you are interested in literature, pick up Little Women. This is especially helpful if you are planning to read many books in a short period of time, as the change of pace can keep you from losing a zeal for reading.

      5. Don’t forget the Word!- This is the most important tip concerning a reading plan. Remember that your purpose in reading is to serve you as you study the Word, and to prepare you for ministry. It’s not intended to replace Bible reading with something else. Whatever your reading plan, it must not take a bite out of your time in the Word.

      Most seminaries offer excellent libraries where students can find books on any subject imaginable. Make use of the extensive collection offered in your library while you have this wonderful opportunity. A reading plan can benefit any seminary student, if well-planned and carried out. By following a reading plan and abiding in God’s Word, there is potential for great growth in seminary apart from and in addition to the rigors of class work. May these tips be helpful; may you grow in grace and truth through your supplemental reading endeavors, and may God always be glorified and honored!

      Pregnant with Purpose

      Today’s post is the first from our Kindle Contest winners.

      I’m pregnant.  Well, not in the real sense.

      Allow me to explain.  You see, I’m a newly-minted seminarian and I’m dealing with the reality of what I wrote as part of my admissions essay this past fall and the reality of what I’m experiencing in my first semester of study.  What I’ve quickly discovered is that I have something growing—intellectually and spiritually—inside of me.  It’s new, it’s mysterious and—while I’m excited about it—I’m also a little anxious.  And, like a pregnancy, I have both good days and not-so-good days.  On the good days, I feel I am right where God wants me to be. On the bad days, I wonder if I ever really understood my faith to begin with.

      In the application I submitted, I shared the hopes I had for a seminary education.  What value did I ascribe to it?  How might I envision using what I learn at seminary to respond to what I see as God’s call on my life?  In reflecting on these questions, I was reminded of the adoption journey that my husband and I started nearly a decade ago.  The process was long and was emotionally draining at times.  Among the myriad of reports, forms, interviews, and profiles we completed during the adoption process, we were asked to consider and share what we thought it meant to be parents and how we might go about raising a child to be a productive, healthy and caring individual in society.

      Well, needless to say, what a person thinks beforehand and what a person actually experiences can feel miles apart.  (Our two beautiful children can attest to that!)  This isn’t to say that what I penned on my seminary admission essay was false.  Indeed it is still very much true.  It’s just that the reality of what I’m experiencing is far more profound than anything that I could have put to paper.  For instance, I shared that I expected to be challenged and, well, let’s say I haven’t been disappointed on that front!  From church history and doctrine to exegetical approaches and more, I’ve encountered thoughts and views and ideas that are somewhat new to me. And, where I might have envisioned a gently flowing stream of ideas and issues has instead become the intense spray of an opened fire hydrant.  Is it a bad thing?  Not at all.  It’s just a bit overwhelming when you are still trying to get a handle on the location of all the bathrooms!  Another hope I had going into seminary was that I could find kindred spirits…those with whom I could travel with on the journey.  And, in that respect, I’ve not been disappointed.

      As with any pregnancy, it comes to an end.  In seminary, I sense it occurs either through the birth of one’s refocused theology, strengthened and tested through the course of examination and study, or it may end with an abandonment of all things theological.  My prayer is that I can ultimately emerge from this journey with a strong conviction of who I am as a child of God and how I might share the joy and the beauty of this loving, growing thing called faith.

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