When Things Don’t Go As Planned

I haven’t written a personal post in a while, so I thought I’d give you a little update.

A Quick Recap

Jennifer and I have been in Orlando for 7 months now.  It has been just about a year since I quit my job as a campus minister in order to go to seminary.  I’m not going to lie, it has been a tough journey.  We almost didn’t come because our house wasn’t sold only weeks before we were planning to move.  That obsticle was removed and we went into high gear trying to get down to Florida asap. Once here, things were good but tough.

Though not an entirely smooth transition, seminary itself was everything I had hoped it would be.  I loved every minute of it (well… except the minutes spent writing papers… I don’t like papers).  The professors were amazing and I was growing in my understanding of God and scripture.  Not only that, but I could feel myself being transformed.  It was amazing.

The Summer Sets In

The summer has been really difficult.  For one, I have WAY too much free time.  I’m taking two classes this summer, so there has been some reading and writing, but generally speaking my academic schedule is pretty light.  Along with that, business has been really slow.  While this has allowed me to work on some other projects and catch up on some things I’ve wanted to tweak on goingtoseminary.com, it has been a constant source of stress… no work = no money.

I also think that the summer has been tough on my wife because I am home all day, every day.  Since I am self employed, I work out of an office in my house.  I think there is an added stress in the house when dad is home all day.  Not just for my wife and kids, but for me too… I’m not used to being in my house 24 hours a day… so, I think that is starting to wear us all down.

The Money Well Runs Dry

As you might guess, the whole no work = no money thing is a big deal.  When we decided to come to seminary we made a step of faith that was informed by us crunching some numbers and thinking that we could make it for a year before things got really hairy (financially).  Our hope was that, once down here God would either begin to prosper my web business or provide for us in some other way that he saw fit.

With the sale of our home we were able to put a nice chunk of money into savings.  This money was designed to pay our rent and cover any monthly shortages (should we have them).  Well, as you guessed, we’ve had more than a few shortages and every month the savings disappears quicker than we had planned.  So, last night as I sat looking at course offerings for next semester I had to ask myself, “what do you do when things don’t go as planned?”

The Options

Well, since things are not going entirely as planned, here are some of the options I’ve come up with:

1. Have faith, register for classes, keep walking forward.
2. Have faith, register for only 2 classes, loose your scholarship, get a part time job
3. Have faith, don’t register for any classes, get a job
4. Have faith, move back to Richmond, get a job
5. Have faith, change from M.Div to MA in Biblical Studies, take out a loan, try to knock out all my classes in under 8 months
6. Have faith, play the lottery

Crunch Time

All six options have some merit and on any given hour I fluctuate between which one makes the most sense.  I do my best to remember that all six options require that I have faith.  I also try to remind myself that the challenges that we are facing are just as much a part of the journey and what God is teaching us.  Though this is not a course for credit, this is part of my seminary education.  Through these difficult days I trust that God is working in me and my family to shape us more into the image of his son.

That said, decisions do need to be made.  I do need to register or not register.  I do need to look for a job or apply for a loan.  I can’t simply hang out in the valley of indecision forever. So, it is crunch time.

Table For Two

If you’re in seminary or considering seminary, odds are you’ll be joining me at this table.  Now, your situation will probably be different, but from what I’ve seen we all face adversity of one sort or another while we are here (can I get an “amen” Terry?).  It is highly likely that things will not go as you planned.  In it all, just remember that God has not abandoned you.  He loves you and is work in you and through you… that doesn’t mean it will always be easy and comfortable… but have faith friend, have faith.

Called To Preach?

If you were to ask most seminarians what their calling is, they would probably respond with something like, “I am called to preach.”  For most seminarians this is true; however, I have had some recent experiences that leads me to question what it means to be “called to preach.”

I am not saying this is inherently wrong, but I have discovered (and have been found guilty myself) that because most of us are “called to preach”, we fail to see the other opportunities for ministry that come available.  For example, I have been in a two month interview process with a church regarding a children’s ministry.  When I was first approached about this ministry, I thought “no way!  I am called to preach.  I am not called to baby sit.”  However, as I had more and more opportunities to preach from the pulpit for churches looking for a pastor, I have realized that God wanted me to look more closely at the children’s ministry.

Something funny began to happen the closer I looked.  For the first time since my first time in the pulpit, I began to feel a little uncomfortable preaching.  Next, I discovered I had a heart for the children (especially in the particular neighborhood of the church) and wanted to reach out to them and their families for the gospel.  As I began to pray more for the children’s ministry, God poured such a deep love into my heart that the children’s ministry began to consume my every thought.  The next thing I knew, I turned down an opportunity to preach at a church looking for a pastor because “God was taking me in another direction” is what I told the man on the phone.

I wish I could say that I came to this understanding of ministry and seminary life during a quiet time or time of communion with God, but that would be lying.  No, it took an off-hand comment by one of my wife’s girlfriend’s as we were leaving her house after dropping our children off for the evening so we could interview with the church for the children’s ministry.  She told me that she and her husband had been looking all over the Louisville area for a children’s ministry to no avail (I know of a couple good ones, but they have only become a major focus of the church in recent months).  She said everyone tells them that “they are called to preach” and that children’s ministry would be like taking a step backward from their goals.  (OK, that one kicked me right in the gut because that was my initial thought when I receieved the email about the position–I had served as youth pastor for a couple years about three years ago.)  I don’t know why, but it struck a chord in me that I did not know was there to be struck.  Between her house and the church (10 minutes), I was moved deeply to seek after this position with a passion that I can only explain as a gift from God.

I guess what I am trying to say is that while you are attending seminary, do not put on the blinders of being called to preach.  When I was ordained, I was ordained not to the preaching ministry, but the gospel ministry.  The gospel should be what drives our motives behind all we do.  Sure, you will get more glory in the pulpit, a demon I am sure we will all have to fight, but do not deprive yourself from blessings because you are only “called to preach.”

Thrifty Thursday - Save on Sports

Ok, not much time left to get a Thrifty Thursday post out there, but I just came across a great deal that I though I’d share.  While checking the deals on slickdeals.com (great thrifty resource) I saw one for 25% off and one item at Sports Authority (good through the 19th).  You can get the in-store coupon here or you can use the following code at the online store (TSA25DEAL).  The catch is that there are a LOT of items on the “fine print” list.  That said, I still managed to score some new tight kicks… Funny “Ryan” trivia is that I only buy tennis/running/sneaker shoes once about every 5 years… my last pair (6 years old) retired a couple weeks ago.

You can use the discount on stuff besides shoes, so if you’re in the market for a new backpack for school or some sunglasses for the summer… hey, 25% off is hard to beat.  Oh, another thing, I noticed that some items not listed on the “excluded” list were not working with the online code (like the shoes I just bought).  However, if you go into the physical store, everything should be fine.  Just tell them that the item isn’t listed on the exclusions and they should honor the discount… initially my shoes didn’t get the  discount but the kind lady at the register took care of that issue.

In totally unrelated news, I launched a new website the other day called Photography Inspiration. It has nothing to do with Thrifty Thursday, but since I own and run Going to SeminaryI figure it is ok to give myself some free advertising… which remides me, did you know that you can now advertise on goingtoseminary.com for A BUCK A DAY!  Heck, for a buck you could just post a picture of yourself and feel cool for a day… the possabilities are endless… feel free to get creative.

The Ultimate Scholarship: Jehovah-Jireh

Attending seminary is understandably tough for most students. It always seems as though there is too much month at the end of a check. To put it another way, “we just ain’t got the money!” So what do you do? How do you pay for all of those books and seminary courses that you know God wants you to take? It sure does not seem as though the scholarship program for seminary X is throwing money at you. What, then, are you to do?

In short, trust God. Now, I understand that that is much easier said than done, but I can honestly speak from experience over the last year (and I am sure the next 3 or 4 as I finish my M.Div.) that He will remain faithful. If God has called you to seminary, then God will provide you the means to pay for your seminary. We all know that the two-letter word “if” has huge implications, but it must be understood in order to proceed on faith.

I know many students who are called to seminary but have had to drop out for various reasons. This does not immediately mean that they are not called to seminary. It does mean that they are not called right now. One thing I have learned is that God will provide for His children in His time. He certainly is in no hurry; after all, He has all of eternity, right?

I know of one minister who is a quadrapalegic who does not have any health insurance at all. Whenever he is asked by doctor’s and hospitals who his insurance provider is, he replies, “I am insured by Jehovah Jireh.” You want to know something amazing about his “insurance provider”? This man lives completely debt free. Talk about faith.

I could easily go on and on about how we should trust in God for all things and that should include your seminary fees and such, but I do not want to do that. I want to encourage you to first of all make certain that you are called to be in seminary. If that answer is in the affirmative, then I believe you have the right to pray to God to provide the money for you to do so. He did create the universe out of nothing, what is a couple grand a year for seminary?

What I am not saying is do not stop looking for scholarships. By all means, if God will bless through that avenue, then be blessed. However, if the scholarships do not come and you are not able to readily pay for seminary, then prayerfully ask God if He wants you in seminary. If He says yes, then trust in Him to provide. He is a faithful God and will always show you a better way.

A Great, Simple, and Cheep Tool Every Seminarian Should Own

Going to seminary involves books… LOTS of books. Half way through my first semester I saw a guy in class open one of his books and proceed to place it on the small metal stand… BRILLIANT I thought. Right there, next to his laptop sat his book, wide open and propped up to reduce having to bend over.

The next day I went to my local Barnes and Nobel and picked one up for $4. It was an AMAZING investment.

Everyone reads in different places. Personally, I am a desk reader. That typically means I have the book on the desk and I’m hunched over it reading. This is a horrible position in which to spend long amounts of time. Now that I have my book stand I simply prop up the book (I usually set the stand on a couple of my bigger books to get it to eye level) and presto, the text is in front of my face and I can sit back and read.

Now, by far, the greatest use of the book stand comes into play during paper time. Being able to prop open a book I’m quoting from or referencing and not having to bend over to read the words then back up to type… priceless! I set the book I’m using right next to my screen and go to town.

Now, there are tons of Book Stand options. For me, the cheap, lightweight book stand is where its at. I can throw it in my bag and take it where ever I go. It makes for a great lunch companion when your hand are full of food and you need to read.

Any other book stand nerds out there?

Two Cent Tuesday - Influential Factors

I was thinking yesterday about the process I went through that lead me to seminary.  It was a long  and drawn out process (here are some excerpts).  While there were MANY factors that influenced my decision to attend seminary, for me the Bible was most influential.  The more I read Paul’s explanations to Timothy and Titus about the role of the Elders in the church, I continually felt as if I fell short in the area of doctrine.  I knew I was called to vocational ministry and that I’d be spending the next 60 +/- years doing it… so I thought that an investment of 3 or 4 years was well worth it for me, my family, and those God would entrust into my care.

So, how about you… what was the most influential factor for you?  No right or wrong answers here… I’m just wondering.

How I got to Seminary

I am sure that there are many unique stories about how people end up getting to seminary. On our forums there is a topic describing peoples top choices in regard to different schools. I didn’t chime in because the only school that I applied to was Asbury. Here is a quick version of how I ended up here.

I grew up a preachers kid so the usual entanglement with religion that PK’s have was a part of my life. In high school I learned about what the church could offer me, so we can just say that my level of involvement was just enough for me to have benefits from it. My life really changed when I hit college. Through a series of events that stretched out over several years I had tremendous experiences with God and also managed to screw things up pretty good too. When I was around 18 I felt a call to vocational ministry, but had no idea what on earth that looked like. My life consisted of various stages of pleading for forgiveness to God and thinking that I had everything together.

You can say everything changed with my life hit rock bottom when I was about 22. I wasn’t quite done with school, but I had cleaned up (literally inside and outside), was working at a small Southern Baptist church (the denomination I grew up in), and was dating the girl who felt called to be a preachers wife. I was presented with a great opportunity, but some friends felt that I wasn’t “religious” enough, and everything pretty much fell apart. I ended up having a nervous breakdown and a bout with alcoholism.

It was at this time that I started doing sound engineering for money and ended up touring with a great group of guys leading worship all over the country. I meet a local college minister and we would talk from time to time. By now, I was realizing that I could make nice money running sound at a mega-church and was planning to enter that world when I finally graduated from college.

Life went forward for a few years, and I met my wife Meredith. My plan was to sell furniture while waiting for her to graduate after we got married. One day I was slipping through the Louisiana Tech Wesley foundation, the home of our previously mentioned college minister. After finding out about the furniture plan, he offered me a job interning at Wesley. I spent the next year and half ministering there.

Wesley changed my personal view of ministry. There was alot that I didn’t say in this little essay, but we can say that my view of God was completely re-organized. One of the things that was promised to me was not ever running sound. While I did end up doing it, I was thankful and I understood why this “rule” was made. My director Scott had been watching me for years, and knew that I had other skills that had never really been brought out. While I was there I learned that I was gifted in organization, teaching, discipleship and just making friends.

You are probably starting to wonder where seminary comes into this…..

I had been thinking about seminary for years, since I was around 20. While touring I always carried a few books with me and attempted to teach myself Greek. Most people knew that I was thinking about seminary. In fact, the first time I sat down with Scott (my director at Wesley) was under the auspices of Asbury Seminary. It actually took around 3 years to get to that conversation. I was raised on the campus of New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary, and I had friends that went to plenty of other seminaries around the country. There was something about Asbury graduates that made me want to check the school out. After spending a weekend here, I saw that many of my own interests were shared, specifically how liturgy can used in the 21st century. What sealed the deal was spending time in the chapel office with J.D. Walt, and seeing how the school puts together a reader for every season of the church calender. Asbury just made sense to me.

I tell people now that I wasn’t sure why I wanted to come to seminary. But I knew I wanted to be at Asbury. I would have come to Asbury if it was a welding school because of what the Holy Spirit has done and is doing in this place.

When searching for a seminary, the most important thing is to find the place that makes you stay up at night with excitement. Asbury is part of my soul now, and I pray that your choice in attending seminary will be part of yours.

Considering Seminary When Others Do Not

So you think God wants you to go to seminary … now what?

How do you know you are meant to head to seminary? Especially when some in your life think it would be a waste of time and resources? So, just how does one proceed to investigate, select and make preparations towards seminary, especially when not many in one’s personal sphere have gone that route?

Perhaps you are like me and Christ rescued you while in college. Or perhaps you grew up in the church, trusted in Jesus at a young age, but only in the last few years began to get “serious” about knowing, loving and enjoy God. It takes a unique person to thrive in seminary. Certainly the rigorous theological training is not meant for all. Yet, if you are on this site you probably are pretty serious about seminary.

(Specifically I have in mind those who come from a church or family background where the influential people in your life do not think highly of a seminary education. My wife and I came from a very healthy and vibrant Bible-saturated church tradition, but one that views seminary as essentially a “cemetery.” Our personal experience has been the exact opposite. While we remain close with many of the leaders of that church movement, we knew that heading to seminary might have closed the door to serving there. We were and remain that convinced of God’s call for us.)

Consider all aspects

Both the good and the bad. Jesus commanded that we truly “count the cost” before following Him (Luke 14:28), and this must certainly include life-shaping decisions like heading to seminary. What are your motivations to attend seminary? What school(s) are you considering? Do you know anyone who has gone or is going there? Are they more mature, godly, worshipful, and joyful as a result? What are the theological bent of the schools you are considering? What are their positions on the exclusivity of Christ, the Gospel, biblical authority and inerrancy? As for the “bad”: What will school cost? How far is it from home? Is there a healthy church in the community? Is it too soon to go, or shall you wait another year? (If married: be sure your spouse is on the same page. Whatever you choose, as long as you are of one-mind, you will do well.) Lay everything out on the table and make an informed, honest and wise choice. And while the gravity of the decision may overwhelm you, know that God is sovereign and He delights in the deliberate thinking and humility of His children. By all means make the process towards seminary one of prayer and worship (1 Peter 5:5-6).

Consider others who have gone before

Do you know a pastor or mentor who navigated through seminary? Any men and women you hope to be like? Much of mentoring is informal, yet can become more intentional, as you ask. Paul wrote to imitate him as he imitated Christ (1 Cor. 11:1); thus following in the steps of others, while being our own unique person, is part of this Christian life. Have you considered asking others to help you make this decision in community (and not on an island)?

Invest in the meantime

Not financially specifically, but relationally, in people. As Jake pointed out recently, this vital aspect of life is key while in seminary. It is also important before (and after) seminary. The academy is aimed at serving the local church, and well, if you aren’t investing in people now you likely will not later.

A few practical considerations

• Clean your room. A wise pastor noted how his Dad reminded him about discerning God’s will of when and where to go in His will, “Johnny, be faithful in cleaning your room, and God will open the door to the room next to it.” Sound advice on excelling from the heart.
• Take your time. There is perhaps a fine line here, as all schools have deadlines. Yet know that if God wills it for you to start in Winter or Spring instead of Fall it will be alright. Wherever you are, be all there. (In our case, we arrived on campus (at a different school than we first planned) two years after dreaming about heading to seminary.)
• Do the necessary paperwork. Be on top of school applications and deadlines, and especially the financial aid documents with FAFSA. Relates more to organization than to be being in hurry.
• Get out of debt; at least as much as possible.
• Talk about it. Are there legitimate reasons why some resist you going to seminary? Specifically, are they against a certain seminary? Can you interview anyone who has “successfully” completed seminary? How about those who are students now?
• Live with an open hand. Praying, not begging. All of life is preparation and the end goal is to know God (John 17:3), even more than fulfilling a lifelong dream.
• Be ready. This relates to consumerism, debt and unnecessary ties to our world.
• Love the Church. The Church is Christ’s chosen Bride, and with her He had determined to share the glorious truth of His Gospel of grace. God will not do it without the church and He purposes that you see yourself wrapped up in the story of others, broken and in need of the Gospel (me and you too!)
• Interview others. Worth mentioning twice, especially because even a campus visit and the best publications cannot convey the value of a seminary education. (Note that any of the writers on this site are more than willing to discuss personal considerations and our own journey. Let us know how we can help - the Forum is a good place for discussions.)

Thrifty Thursday - Free Family Fun

Having kids can be expensive… especially when “fun” is involved. Being an Orlando resident affords us many fun activities, however many of them cost a LOT of money. A trip to Disney with the kids would cost almost $200. So, needless to say we haven’t visited the oversize mouse just yet.

So, what do we do on our tight budget for family fun? Well, here are a few things but feel free to add your own in the comment section:

• Public Library - With younger kids this is a real winner. Most libraries have a kids section and numerous events just for kids throughout the week. Currently my wife takes the kids to story time once a week and the kids love it. Even when there isn’t a story time the library offers lots of fun stuff for the kids.
• Barnes and Noble - Typically once a week we go to B&N after dinner. It is a good way to blow those couple hours between dinner and bed time when you want to get out of the house but the weather isn’t cooperating. The kids section is great and, of course, there is the Thomas the Train toys to play with.
• The Park - If you’re a parent then odds are you know where every playground is within 20 miles of your house. This is a great option because it affords the kids a chance to play with other kids their age. Also, it is a great way for you to meet new people. Now, if you’re like me, you live in Florida and you only go to the park in the winter when it is 78 degrees. The summer heat is typically a bit too much for the park on a regular basis.
• Mall Playground - Sadly, the malls in Orlando have crummy playgrounds. When we lived in Richmond the mall was a weekly destination for the play area.
• Family Walk - Again, with the heat, these have become less popular with the family, however, when the temprature was right we often took an evening stroll together.

Now, I’m sure there are lots of other ideas out there, so lets hear’em…

Make Yourself at Home

In an earlier post, Ryan discussed how seminary can sometimes come to be viewed more as a means to an end or as a stepping stone than a time of formation and growth. Asking questions such as what plans we have after we are done with seminary only fuel this kind of perspective.

One of the problems with having this mentality is that you will not properly establish yourself in whatever area you move to in order to attend seminary. Understanding seminary as a stepping stone to something else will only lead you to view your whole life at that particular time and place as a stepping stone. You will never fully unpack the boxes, so to speak. Your apartment will be more like a hotel room than a home.

As a result, a few things might happen. First, you will likely not develop many solid and authentic friendships. Perhaps you are thinking about returning to wherever you came from, and so you focus your energy on maintaining those friendships and those ties. While there is not anything inherently wrong with this, it will keep you from building bonds between the people around you for the next several years. Those friendships are essential for getting through seminary. Your close friends will challenge you, encourage you, strengthen you, rebuke you, and just be there for you like your friends back home cannot practically do. If you do not establish those sorts of friendships, your time in seminary will be very lonely. If you are married, this will likely be an even greater struggle for your spouse.

Second, if you do not make that place authentically “home” for the time you are living there, it is likely that you will not develop the type of relationship with the church you choose to attend that you need to. You will certainly be a part of a church, especially as you are required to serve a certain number of hours as an intern at a church in order to get your degree, but you will not really become part of that church. You will do your duties, but you will miss out on the type of communal fellowship that belongs to the local body of Christ. Again, to miss out on this will make for a very lonely experience–not to mention the fact that this will seriously impede your spiritual growth and development.

These are only a couple of things that may happen if you take this perspective, but they are significant things. And while maybe you have plans to return to where you came from or to move somewhere else once you are completed seminary and serve in ministry there–and these plans are good–do not let them be your sole focus while you are in seminary. Cherish this opportunity with all your heart, and seek to immerse yourself in the blessings that come with being in this situation. Make it home for you (and your family) for the next few years, with all the connotations which that word conveys.

For some people this will be easier than others. If you have moved around a lot, making a new place home is maybe not that difficult. If you have lived in the same place your whole life, this will be more of a struggle. If you are newly married and this new place is where you are starting your lives together, the transition will be a lot easier. If you have friendships going back to your childhood, it will be tougher. But this is where God has placed you and has called you to for this point in your life, and you will mine all the riches of this experience if you allow yourself to. It may only be three years. But a lot can happen in three years. Grab hold of it.

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